Friday, January 22, 2010

Today is Like Any Other

I have decided to give my blog a real topic. In case you haven't noticed I have changed the title of my blog to "Path to Purpose". I am on a quest; one that I have taken many, many times before and left empty handed. Something has to change; something in me must change in order to finish my quest with the grand prize. The grand prize for me is to have a fulfilling life devoid of boredom. I have no patience and therefore want everything to happen right now but this is not reality and a part of me understands that. The other bigger part of me doesn't care for patience one bit. I think this may have something to do with the fact that if I have to be patient, I will probably lose interest and be back at square one in no time at all. You see, it is not safe for me to have patience. Patience only starts the never ending rollercoaster ride that is my mind. I have likened my life to the movie with Bill Murray "Groundhog's Day". Besides writing this blog, my Friday will be no different than any other Friday. This is the day I go to the bank and get errands done and if I'm lucky someone at the grocery store will hit me with their cart just to break up the monotony.
My hopes of going back to school is not looking very promising. I have a short article I wrote yesterday promoting my blog that I hope to get published (fingers crossed everyone). Today will be a quest free day unless I find the time but I will be sure to keep you posted.

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

A Moment in Time With a Bipolar Child

Bipolar Disorder runs in my family. Both me and my son have Bipolar. Two Bipolar people living under the same roof is definately a struggle almost every day. I just had a moment with my son that has compelled me to write this blog post.
My son's glasses were broke last week and we just got his new glasses today. He wasted no time in losing them. When I was told by my daughter that my son lost his glasses, he immediately became angry with her for telling me. His anger at losing his glasses was not actually directed at his sister but portrayed in just such a manner. The glasses were luckily found but it left me with a question. Why, when we are angry with ourselves do we project our anger onto others?
Part of me thinks that we outwardly portray anger to others when it is more internal anger because of our mood. We are angry and upset, therefore, making us angry and upset with everything and everyone. I also see the portrayal as a lack of taking personal responsibility for our actions. It is always easier to blame others than to blame ourselves for a mistake. I believe at times we blame others, or appear to blame others subconciously. Whether our behavior is subconcious or with purpose others are unjustly paying the consequences for actions they had no part in.
I make every attempt I know how to teach my children the importance of taking responsibility for their own actions. I believe we have all been guilty at some point in our lives, especially if we really think about it, of projecting inward anger towards other people. I think we all must make a conscious effort to avoid projecting anger where anger is not due.
I have added two links to websites that can give insite on children with Bipolar or if you believe you or your child may be suffering from depression these sites may be helpful.

Monday, January 11, 2010

For my first post I would like to welcome all readers. I also hope for readers. I named my blog "Thoughts of a Thinker" because I often find myself thinking about all sorts of topics. When I start writing I find that my thoughts go everywhere and bounce from subject to subject. I ponder on such things as; what happens when we die and know the whole time I am pondering that the answer will never be found. People have all sorts of opinions about this and almost all of them are different. Then at times I wonder about space and planets and whether aliens really exist or not. By the way, my opinion on aliens is that if they weren't out there somewhere what an awful waste of space it would be. The unbelievers' of alien existence tells me that we think to highly of ourselves, that the possibility of other intelligence is just to outrageous to be considered. I think if we were the smartest beings there is then we are in serious trouble people.

Now I hope you have an understanding (somewhat) of why my blog is entitled "Thoughts of a Thinker". I look forward to sharing more posts with you in the future.